Since I'm moving and downsizing, I found this in one of my trunks. Postmarked April 8, 1994, it came from my college roommate (I graduated in '93). I thought it was witty:
It is time once again to gather together in a frenzy of food, booze and debauchery. On Saturday April 30th, there will be a mass gathering at the home of my birth. Festivities will begin at or about 3 p.m. Saturday and will continue through Sunday May 1st, culminating with an eventing with 7 Seconds at City Gardens in beautiful Downtown Trenton. Saturday's festivities will consist of a massive barbecue running the length of the day. Sunday Brunch will consist of fruit juice and aspirin. If you want to attend the 7 Second show, please send $8.00 and your name care of: [[my friend's address]]
Please remember to reserve your weekend for this event for without you, my loyal friends, my like is meaningless.